Sunday, January 29, 2012

Chapter 8: Am I Gonna Die?

As promised, here's an exerpt from Chapter 8 of my book AM I GONNA DIE? "I called Moms hospital room that night and I am still haunted to this day of our conversation. Mom couldn't say any word but Yes. She didn't even know who I was when I called. I tried to ask her questions about what was going on or if she knew where she was; she had no clue. I couldn't believe my ears. Dad had warned me that she was in bad shape and to not call her, but this was my mother, and all I wanted was to hear her voice. I kept trying to convince myself that she was going to be okay, but after talking to her that Monday night, I wasn't so sure that would happen. I was sitting alone in my hotel room in Philadelphia, when I received a call from my Aunt Lynette (Moms sister) late that Thursday night. I knew that if she was calling me, and not Dad or my sister Lindsey, that whatever news she was going to give me wasn't good. "Honey I wasn't sure whether to call you or not, but you have the right to know what's going on...." "Oh god Aunt Lynette, what's wrong?" My heart started pounding harder than it ever had, my head started hurting, my arms and legs went numb, my chest felt like it was going to explode. "David you might need to drive down here as soon as you can. I've been with your Mom the past few days and things aren't getting better. I'm not know.....(I could hear Aunt Lynette sobbing as she struggled to speak) "Aunt she dying?" " need to get down here as soon as possible.....I'm so sorry." It's amazing how strong Mom was while she battled for her life during those 8 days in the hospital. As devastated as we were to see her in the condition she was in, we never left her side. Mom you were always an inspiration to me and always will be. Take the time to tell your Mom how much you appreciate her and love her today. You only have 1 mother, and you never know when that day will come for her to be taken away. I love my Mom more than anything, and the only time she ever saw me cry was in her hospital room. Me, Dad, Clint, and Lindsey stood around her bed as she Mom looked at all of us withna blank stare and she started crying. All she could ask was, "Am I Gonna Die?"


  1. What a beautiful exerpt from your book. I lost my mom 4 years ago. We began our journey Jan 28th and she lost her battle on Feb 20,2008. You are right you never know.....

    1. While you're name on here Leslie "Tarheelgirl" should officially be deleted because you're a North Carolina fan, I won't hold that against you LOL. I really appreciate your kind words, and I'm so sorry about your mom. I know you and I have talked about that several times and my heart goes out to you for your loss. You know she's always looking down on you and your wonderful family, but she can't help your Tar Heels make jump shots against my Kentucky Wildcats! You'll always be a great friend of mine and I hope that never changes.....

  2. that you are keeping the posts bud....good stuff.

  3. Thanks so much Brian. You know that I couldn't have ever done this without you. As rough as it was to tell you about my battle with Parkinson's and alcohol, you always stood by my side and never treated me differently. I know people tell me that the world would be a much better place if more people like me existed. I'm always like, "you mean if more people had Parkinson's this would be a better world?" HAHA...just kidding, but I know it would be a greater world to live in if there were more people like you. You're the best Brian.